So, blogger fail. I shot these photos a little bit ago and now only a few of the pieces are available. So, instead of just talking about today's look, I'm also going to talk about something that has been on my mind for years. 

To preface, nothing specifically happened, it's just something that I see a lot of (with myself and other  females), and wanted to share my thoughts. I actually wrote this post over a month ago and it's been sitting in my drafts. The first draft was a bit harsh, so I went back and edited. Here we are. 

Why are women so judgmental toward other women? Maybe it's just me - I tend to overanalyze everything - but it seems that girls are always battling/comparing/judging other women. Aren't we in this movement of #girlpower?! I will admit, its probably way worse now that social media has such a strong presence. Being a blogger, I see and hear about the criticism that happens via social media. It's kind of disgusting. 

It's not that I've gotten "judged" recently, but I have always struggled with connections with other females. Some girls I meet and have an instant connection and friendship with, and other girls, not so much. It seems like conversations flow well in more of a group setting, but otherwise it feels like there is some pre-conceived notion that women have about me. Is it the fact that I'm a blogger and post photos of myself and clothes on the daily? Maybe they feel I'm arrogant, or overly confident, or I don't know - bitchy. 

A girl (now friend) once told me in high school - I really didn't like you in middle school, I just thought you were rude. And the reality? I kept to myself and wasn't the first to engage in a conversation (it's called being shy), so I was immediately labeled as "that kinda girl". She later admitted that being quiet and shy was exactly what made her feel like I was 'rude'. So I can't help but think that others feel that same way. Do y'all ever get that? 

It's something that bothered me then and still bothers me now. I will be the first one to talk to the person that no one else talks to, listen, give advice - just be a genuine friend. And sometimes I feel like I'm not even given that opportunity. Not to say that I should click with every single girl, or even need to be friends with everyone (that's clearly not realistic), but it kills me when I feel like I'm put to the side simply because I keep my mouth closed and do my own thing. 

The one thing I wish for myself is to be an extrovert. I wish I was the most outgoing friend who could go up and start a conversation with anyone. But I'm not. And that's okay. And what I wish for this world is that girls would break the barrier, let their guard down and realize that we're all in this together. We can all be successful. We can be decent to one another without being best friends. 

Like I said in the beginning, women should empower one another. Be respectful, be happy and encouraging. Say hi and smile. A smile goes a long way. 

So in turn and not just to make this about me - to anyone reading this blog post that I may have made feel this way, I'm sorry. I sure hope that I was never "that girl" too involved in myself to realize what was happening around me.

Let's keep it positive y'all. Give someone a chance in your life. You never know - that girl that you could be judging on the sideline could really be the friend you've always longed for. Or she could be exactly what you have pictured in your mind, and in that case, kudos to you for keeping your distance. Ha! 

Anyone else ever feel this way, or is just me? Not even sure what sparked this post. Maybe I had a second to stop and think. Either way, just sharing some thoughts. Spread love, my friends! 





OH, but before I end this post. Check out this cute necklace! It's from Ettika and I really like it. It can be paired with so many things. Kind of a basic gold necklace, but with a twist. You know? Check it out here, along with their other cute pieces. They have offered my peeps a 15% discount with code @signingsteph. Woohoo! 





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8 comments

  1. I loved this post, because I can relate in so many ways. I'm pretty sure people think I'm rude too due to my shyness lol. But I'm determined to change some of that. Thank you so much for sharing

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    1. Same, girl! Glad to know that I'm not the only one feeling that way, although I hate it for the both of us. I love your positive attitude on changing it, though. Thank you for stopping by and reading, and sharing your thoughts!

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  2. I loved this post!! It's so true. I've had a hard time connecting with other girls and I'm an extrovert. I've always felt like the third friend in a way. Never the friend who is so and so's BFF. Does that make sense? But you've been there for me so much, especially through these past two years. Many of my friends disappeared but you didn't! I know it was hard for you to see me like that but you stayed with me at the hospital and brightened my day. I can never thank you enough for that! I love you!

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    1. Thanks, Cass! You are a total extrovert, but I completely understand what you're saying. And of course I stuck around. I LOVE you! Our friendship is too important to me to let something scare me away. I'm glad you enjoyed it, and it's the least I could have ever done for you!

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  3. finding new friends in general is hard as I age. I have 4-5 girls I know I can count on but everyone lives in a different state.
    I would consider myself mostly an extrovert, but if I'm in a new situation or somewhat uncomfortable I tend to stay quieter and more often than not have RBF. I've been trying to work on it because I've heard from now friends that they weren't sure about me at first because the RBF. But yes, I really think we can be kind to each other without being friends!

    have a good weekend.

    xo, Maddy
    http://cassidylou.com/

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    1. It is so hard! At least blogging helps open the door for new friendships... even if they are just online. RBF... it gets the best of us. I have that for sure! haha.

      Hope you had a great weekend too!

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  4. I'm a little late as always :)... but AMEN!!!! Such a great post! As women, we should be lifting each other up, not tearing each other down. For some, it is hard to connect - I am that way. Even with the friends I do have, I do not do a good job of staying in touch but I still love them :) Let's all stop judging each other and try getting to know each other better.

    BTW - I recently wore the exact outfit you have posted! Glad to know it looked good :)

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    1. Haha, you're fine! I always know you catch up on the blog at once.. I usually get a few comments from you at a time. :) It is difficult to meet new people, and even stay in touch with our current friends. I mean look at us and Katie - we have to force ourselves to set a date on dinner or something. We always figure it out though!

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